Similarly, the famous Droeshout portrait of Shakespeare in the First Folio, an image which Mark Twain said resembles “a bladder,” and of which the artist Gainsborough remarked, "I never saw a Stupider face," does not seem to portray a writer. An examination of most writers’ portraits of the period shows laurel wreaths, books, and other literary insignias. It is more a comic caricature (with many intentional errors in it).
The man’s grave inscription has also troubled many scholars:
GOOD FREND FOR JESUS SAKE FORBEARE,
TO DIGG THE DUST ENCLOASED HEARE!
BLESTE BE THE MAN THAT SPARES THESE STONES,
AND CURSED BE HE THAT MOVES MY BONES.
Did the greatest poet of the English language write such doggerel?
A more serious revelation in the will comes with the Stratford man’s signatures. Not only did he never develop a distinctive signature, unlike other writers of the day, but also each of his signatures is scribbled in a hand that appears never to have held pen to paper! And each time he scratched his name, he spelled it differently... within the SAME document!
This has led some scholars to speculate that he must have had some sort of stroke before signing. But if that were the case, the clerk would have had Shaksper seal rather than sign his will, a document that begins with the claim that he is “in perfect health & memorie god be praysed." Besides, three other poorly written signatures survive from legal documents dating from four years earlier.
The Stratford man’s last will and testament also poses a problem. Despite itemizing every pot, pan, bed and sword, it mentions no plays, manuscripts, shares in the Globe theatre, or books.
Books were extremely rare and expensive. The Shakespeare works refer to and rely on more than 200 books, many not available in England, and some not yet translated from Greek, Latin, Spanish, Italian or French.
By comparison, scholars have found over 200 books belonging to playwright Ben Jonson and poet John Donne.
Shaksper bequeathed no books in his will, which was unusual for that time. By comparison, Sir Philip Sidney bequeathed all of his books to court poets Fulke Greville and Edward Dyer. His will also contains no mention of furniture to hold books, no bookcases or shelves, nor even a writing desk, paper, ink nor pen! It reveals a life with no literary or musical or artistic or cultural interests.
Another problem with the will is that the only line that ties this document to the London theatre scene is a gift of money for remembrance rings to fellow actors John Hemmings, Richard Burbage and Henry Condell. But upon close examination, it is clear that this line of text was inserted at a later date between two original lines of the will in another clerk’s handwriting. So the only tie between Shaxpere and his dearest friends in the theatre world was apparently an afterthought.
One other thing about the scrawled signatures is that they reveal that the first syllable of the family name was sounded with a short and not a long “a”.